I was watching TV late at night a couple days ago and caught a commercial for one of those cheesy “As Seen on TV” products: Glow Pets.
Immediately upon watching this, Glo Worms came to mind. Which made me realize how much I loved my Glo Worm when I was little.
Glo Worms took the scene in 1982, and if you aren’t familiar with them, they had a plastic face and a soft body. When you hugged or squeezed the body, the Glo Worm’s face would light up. After Hasbro saw what a crazy success the Glo Worm was, they expanded the line to include books, videos, night lights, and other crap us children of the 80s totally ate up.
This was entirely too cheerful for me to deal with as a child.
I know there was a Glo Worm cartoon, The Glo Friends, but I don’t remember ever watching it. That was the thing with cartoons in the 1980s—so many were based on toy lines that I couldn’t keep up. I had a bunch of My Little Ponies, but rarely watched the show. Proof that I can enjoy toys without knowing where the hell they came from.
The toy line continued well into the 1990s, but it was revealed in 2005 that Glo Worms could and would kill you. Okay, that’s a little dramatic, but apparently the Glo Worm’s head was softened with phthalates, something kids shouldn’t swallow. Thankfully I wasn’t a serial killer, so I never ate the face off of my Glo Bug. Way to be timely with that warning 23 years too late.
Anyway, back to what originally inspired this article—Glow Pets. There’s a few varieties of these, including the Glow Zebra, Glow Bear, and Glow Penguin. BUT there are also some that share the same names as Glo Friends—I see you Lightening Bug (close enough!), Snail, and Turtle!
Are these close enough to warrant a lawsuit? Well, probably not. These things are like if Glo Worms and Pillow Pals mated in some kind of kinky plush orgy. I’m also not so sure I’d want to sleep on a glowing pillow, but that’s just my general aversion to light talking.
Final Verdict: I’m sticking with my Glo Bug, ya’ll. Two-year-old Linz had it right!
What do you think of Glow Pets? Were you a Glo Worms fan? Leave us a comment below!